the marvelous adventures of jules & john

You know what’s fun? Dressing your kid up for Halloween. You know what isn’t fun? When she turns 17 and decides that it’s time to retire the cuddly bumble-bee attire for some slutty-bee digs. What is wrong with kids these days? Why do you have to be a slutty fireman? What’s wrong with just a regular fireman? I fear life 15 years from now…

Moving on.

Doesn’t Beatrice make the cutest bee you ever saw? This weekend we attended the Irvington Halloween Festival with B’s frog-friend Wes. He thought his froggy hands were pretty spectacular and enjoyed waving them in B’s face as seen here:

She was less than impressed. Does this kid not make a perfect frog?

Tonight is Halloween and do you want to know a secret? I’ve never had a real trick-or-treat experience. So we dressed up our Bee, carved a pumpkin, bought some candy, and waited… and waited… yup, still waiting. We’ve had three visitors. Trick-or-treating isn’t nearly as exciting as I expected. And what’s with kids taking 6 pieces of candy when I tell them they can have 2? Little rascals… 

When I was a little girl I grew up on a farm… and was the daintiest, girliest farm kid you’ve ever seen. I desperately wanted an American Girl doll, dreamed of going to Paris, and thought I would make a really good ballerina if only my parents would sign me up for some lessons. Animals kind of grossed me out and I wore dresses as I tromped through the woods. 

Oh yeah, and I played the violin.

Don’t get me wrong, I still got dirty and spent as much time on my bike as I did with my dolls, but I was 100% G.I.R.L.

I really couldn’t believe my luck when I found out that my firstborn was a girl. I can not wait to take Beatrice to Flying Cupcake in the afternoon for some girly treats. I’m probably going to have more fun than she is when we go to the American Girl store in Chicago for her 5th birthday. And by golly, you better believe that the two of us will someday be eating brightly-colored macaroons while looking up at the Eiffel Tower. 

Side Note: I am not going to be one of those crazies that puts makeup on her daughter in 3rd grade and encourages her her to have boyfriends and take ballet. If she wants to play basketball, that’s fine. And do you think it’s strange that all of my little fantasies for her involve brightly-colored, sugary treats? I just really like food, ok?

Anyway, while I keep hearing that all of these dresses and headbands B wears are going to turn my little lady into a tomboy, I’m pretty sure that Miss Beatrice Vallee Reynolds is a girly girl through and through: 

I put her tutu on her the other day and it resulted in massive excitement. The girl was captivated. She played with the layers of tulle longer than I’ve seen her play with anything. I can’t wait until she starts dressing herself and comes out of her room sporting a rain jacket and a tutu… 

I love my little girl. I can’t believe she’s all mine!

Let’s talk about life before and after you have a baby. I used to go to work, put some time in at the gym, mosey to the grocery store to pick up a little of this and a little of that, take my second shower of the day, cook a proper meal, and then settle in for the night with the husband, tv, and some homework. My life looked much like this:

It was chaotic juggling school and work… but I thrive with the right amount of chaos.

Side Note: For those of you who don’t know, I make graphs for a living… and for fun. You should see the fancy charts I’ve made illustrating the different aspects of pregnancy.

Then came Beatrice. Here is what my life looks like now:

Oh yeah, I quit school. More on that later. The biggest difference in my life now, is that everything is split into teeny tiny segments of time, interrupted by feedings and diaper changes. 

I remember my mom getting stressed out about being gone too many weekends in a row, and I would blow it off like it was no big deal and she was just acting crazy. Beatrice and I have spent the last three weekends out of town, and now I understand. When you’re a working mother there is no TIME during the week to do anything but the bare minimum, and after 3 weekends away, the piles of laundry, lack of groceries, and inch of dust on the shelves has caused me to reach craziness. I haven’t even updated my blog in a week and have been MIA from my beloved facebook. I’ve been waiting for a moment when John could watch Bebe and I could get some groceries, but that might never happened, which means today she either comes with me or the family starts eating cans of cream of mushroom soup.  

Yes, I know you’re all dying to comment on the ways I can be more efficient with a baby in my life. Hang in there, I’m not done.

When I was pregnant, my naive self thought that my juggling act would continue as normal when B was born. I made a schedule displaying when Beatrice would be with me, John, and the Nanny. I figured out when I would shop and clean and go to the gym. 

But I didn’t factor in HOW MUCH I would adore this baby. 

I hate it that I only have a few hours each evening with Beatrice before she goes to bed and I want to make the best of that time. That means playing with her, chatting her up, going for walks in the park and adventures at the art museum. She is growing SO FAST and this time will never be returned to me. I can clean when she’s 13 and doesn’t want to hang out with her uncool, graph-making mom anymore. I can only stick her in a carrier and wander around aimlessly outdoors watching her little nose turn red and her eyes light up at the sight of falling leaves for so long. 

This weekend, we’re in Indianapolis. I will clean. I will grocery shop with her in tow. I will do the laundry. But I will do all of that between quality times with my darling Beatrice. If it doesn’t all get done, so be it. 

And when she goes to bed exhausted at 7pm, I’ll be sleeping right beside her. 

These days I feel like if I blink I’m going to miss some monumental change in Beatrice. One day she can wear a dirty diaper all day and not make a fuss, the next day she discovers the difference between wet and dry wants the wet one off NOW. She’s more chatty and smiley today than yesterday, and tomorrow I’ll be amazed at her progress once again. 

Progress isn’t always for the best though - this afternoon our normally good traveler decided that three hours in the car seat was 45 minutes too long and yelled the rest of the time. I hope this isn’t going to be a normal thing. 

She changed quickly during her first 6 weeks with us, but these last seven weeks have been crazy. It really sucks that in the US parents have to go back to work just when things are getting really exciting and their baby isn’t just a eating/sleeping machine… and it really REALLY sucks when you’re the mom and you haven’t experienced your daughter’s belly laugh yet because you’re at work in the morning when she’s the happiest. Sigh. 

Remember last week when I was convinced that my breastfeeding days were at their last? I had gone out of town to a wedding, forgot my pump, and was trying desperately to fix what I’d done. Well guess what - I’m back to normal! 

Here’s what I did:

• I drank Yogi Woman’s Nursing Support Tea four times a day
• I pumped like a mad-woman. We’re talking every two to three hours for 15 to 20 minutes. 
• I let B use me as a pacifier whenever she wanted.
• I ate healthy food. A LOT of healthy food. 

But in the end, I think what helped me the most was going away on a mini-vacation with John. I was able to get sleep and de-stress, which apparently was just what I needed to find my lost supply of milk. 

Today is our two year wedding anniversary. To celebrate, we spent the weekend in a beach house in Michigan City on Lake Michigan. It was seriously the best weather ever. The entire front of the house was made up of french doors, which we kept open the whole time - day and night. 

Little Bebe was left with my family. Did I let out a couple of tears as we walked out of the house? You betcha. I missed that little twerp a LOT, but it was certainly nice to sleep a full night. 

Are you jealous yet? Look how clear that water is!

Do you want to know what we did the whole time? Beach, eat, hot tub, repeat duh. We also went shopping since you’re supposed to get cotton on your second anniversary - but then meandered back to the house to get back on our beach-eat-hot tub schedule. 

John and I are excellent vacation partners. We both appreciate a good book and avoid taking part in a million different activities. We will be SO good at being retired… and there is no one I’d rather retire with!

Want to know what we’re wearing? 

On me: Shorts - Banana Republic. Shirt - Old Navy.

On John: Both Shirts - H&M. Red Trunks - JCrew. Other Shorts…. I have no idea.

pssst…. 

This weekend Beatrice and I traveled north for a wedding. I forgot my breast pump, which wasn’t a huge deal since B was by my side for all but the 6 hours I spent at the wedding. She sleeps for 6 hour stints where I don’t pump - no problem.

Apparently this WAS a problem because I’ve been dealing with a next-to-nothing supply since then. It’s ridiculous - WHAT HAPPENED? Six hours should not destroy 3 months of consistent breastfeeding. 

So I’ve been pumping constantly to try to perk up my supply. I let Beatrice use me as a human pacifier. I’m drinking tea that’s supposed to improve my situation. And I’m producing peanuts next to what I was. 

Today I called the doctor who asked me a series of questions about my sleep & eating habits, and stress levels as of late. Well guess what, I ate cookies all weekend, didn’t sleep because B didn’t sleep, and have one million things to do at work and one upset little girl at home and a weekend getaway coming up that doesn’t include Beatrice…. aka stress. And let me tell you what, trying to be unstressed when you’re stressed about not being able to feed your formula-hating child is not easy. 

This sucks. Tomorrow I’m going to try to hunt down some fenugreek and if all else fails, I can always try a prescription drug that increases milk. Am I missing something? Does anyone have any other tips to make this better?

This weekend Beatrice and I went north to visit my parents. My family moved to a new house a few years ago, and my dad has made great use of his increased acreage by accumulating a slew of animals. They have dogs, cats, chickens, cows, horses, goats, ducks… am I missing anything? I think it is going to be great fun for Beatrice to visit Grandma and Grandpa’s petting zoo as she gets older. Who knows - maybe he’ll even pick up a pint-sized pony for a pint-sized little girl to ride.

My mom is going to kill me when she see’s this picture… but she looks so disgusted with Amos running through her garden that I couldn’t help myself.

B got a big kick out of the horses:

At one point I wondered why all of the cats were sitting on the fence posts. Then I noticed the two dogs holding them hostage up there. Mario had the best weekend of his life. I’d let him out in the morning and pretty soon there would be a flurry of chickens or cow running through the pasture at top speed. He knew better than to chase the horses though - the last time he tried that, he got kicked in the back.